Hedgehog the Sonic and Many Others
by Sonja The Nub
Summary: This will include many parodies, mostly involving Sonic, which I have written either while sugar high, bored or hyper. WARNING: Contains sexual references, swearing, lack of seriousness AND hedgehogs. (Changed to M so I don't need to censor words...) DOUBLEWARNING: NO SERIOUSNESS!


"Sonic, why the hell are we in a car?" Tails, whom was sitting in the front seat, asked his older brother, who was in the drivers seat.

"And that's why Sonic Drift sucks!" Silver grinned from the back-right seat. Shadow, whom was sitting on the back-left seat, rolled his eyes.

"Where are we going again?" Knuckles asked.

"Well, Doctor Eggman said there was a creepy thin man everyone keeps seeing in that forest over there." Sonic pointed to the dark forest which was surrounded by a wire fence.

"And you think it's a good idea to investigate?" Shadow raised his eyebrow.

"Shut the fuck up, Faker." Sonic spat.

Shadow shut his mouth.

"I brought a camera, five flashlights and a pair of pants." Tails lifted a grey bag.

"We don't even wear pants. Why did you get those?" Sonic asked.

"Just incase you wet yourself." Tails told him, not even cracking a smile. Silver snickered and reached into his light-blue backpack.

"Silver, not in the car." Sonic saw Silver pulling marijuanna out of his bag.

"Awww..." Silver sadly put the drugs back in his bag.

After a few, silent minutes, the five boys arrived at the forest. They all got out of the car and slung their backpacks over their shoulders. Tails handed each of the boys a flashlight; they all had full batteries.

"Silver, you get to hold the camera." Tails shoved the camera into the hedgehog's hands.

"Why me?" Silver whined.

"Because no-one wants to see your ugly face. It belongs behind the cemera."

"Good point." Knuckles chimed in as he turned on his flashlight.

* * *

I still don't see anything..." Sonic commented as the five mobians walked through the forest. They could hear crickets chirping and the occasional sound of Silver trying to fap, but otherwise nothing.

"SLENDERMAN!" Sonic shouted.

"Slenderwhat?" Knuckles looked at him.

"Really, Silver? You're trying to masturbate at a time like this?" Shadow looked at the psychokinetic hedgehog.

"W-Well, I couldn't do it in the car!" Silver nervously protested. "And it's not like I can shove my marijuanna up my ass!"

"I'll shove a tree up there in a minute if you don't shut up." Tails shot Silver a death glare. "Don't turn this into a porno."

Silver chuckled nervously and lifted the camera back up.

"Sleeeeendermaaaaan! Where aaaaaaare yooooooou~?" Sonic cupped his hands around his mouth to make a megaphone. "Come on oooouuuuuuut!"

Suddenly, the five mobians heard a noise and looked behind them. A tall, thin man in a black suit with white skin, no eyes, no mouth, no visible nose and tentacles reaching out from behind his back was standing there.

"HOLY SHIT!" Sonic turned and ran the other way, Shadow and the others quickly following. Sonic was yelling a barrage of swear words, girly screams and constant yelling at Silver to stop moaning. Everyone else except Silver was doing pretty much the same thing. They all hid behind a bush.

"I think we lost him..." Knuckles panted. He felt something crinkle under his hand.

"Pringles?" Sonic looked under Knuckles' hand. "Oh, it's just a piece of paper." Sonic picked it up. Everyone else looked over his shoulder and read it aloud.

"Always watches. No eyes." All five read out.

"We're gonna die aren't we?" Silver asked.

"Can I hold the camera?" Shadow asked Silver.

"Hell nah."

"Give it to me."

"No."

"YES."

"Naah."

Shadow snatched the camera out of Silver's hands.

"Just incase we don't make it, Sonic..." Tails looked at his older brother.

"Yes, Tails?" Sonic looked back up at him.

"I stuck your toothbrush up my butt last week." Tails admitted.

"...I'm sorry, what?" Sonic gave Tails a 'WTF' look. He immediately threw up in the bush, spluttering curses as he did so. Knuckles began to laugh and roll on the ground. Silver hid on the other side of the bush, still trying to fap.

"Let's speed this up a bit, shall we?" Shadow went behind the bush with Silver.

* * *

(NO. I AM NOT WRITING SMUT.)

* * *

Silver was laying down on the ground, saliva dripping from the corner of his mouth. Shadow stood up and walked in the opposite direction of where they came (Haha, came...) from. Sonic, Knuckles and Tails, whom were horrified by what they had just witnessed, stood up and followed suit. Silver noticed and got back up, following his... erm, 'friends'.

"I have an idea!" SIlver claimed.

No one even turned to look at him.

"I have an idea." Knuckles claimed.

Everyone turned to look at him.

"Why don't we search for more of those notes? Also, Silver, find out how to get out of here." Knuckles looked at Silver. The hedgehog nodded and quickly made his way over to the wire fence. A few seconds later, Sonic and the others could hear Silver's screams. Dead silence followed.

Sonic stared at Knuckles. "You killed Silver!"

...

Everyone begun laughing... everyone not including Shadow, whom was looking in the trees behind the group.

"Uh... guys?" Shadow pointed a shaking finger at the trees.

"Wh-what?" Sonic recovered from his laughing fit.

"Look." Shadow didn't take his eyes off whatever it was he could see. Knuckles, Sonic and Tails slowly turned their heads to see what Shadow saw. It was none other than Slenderman.

"...Fuck." Was all that escaped Sonic's mouth. All of their vision went fuzzy. Sonic quickly turned around and ran the other way, Shadow quickly following. They didn't see what happened to Knuckles or Tails.

* * *

Sonic looked around. "I think we're safe." He said to Shadow.

"Where are the other two?" The black hedgehog quickly looked around the clearing.

Sonic went silent.

"See ya!" He said after a few seconds, grabbing the camera and Shadow's flashlight, running as fast as he could out of the forest. Shadow stood still, trying to comprehend what just happened. He couldn't see anything, he was alone and a creepy thin man with no eyes was looking for him... that couldn't end well.

* * *

"Ooh, Sonikku made a video!" Amy was looking through her subscription box on YouTube. The video was titled 'Forest Fun' (Totally not the name of a Yaoi porn fanfiction.) . "Strange name..." Amy shrugged her shoulders and watched the whole video.

"...What did I just watch?" Amy wondered. She heard static noises and turned around. A tall, thin man with white skin and no eyes was standing there.

_**FIN.**_


End file.
